Quantum Synchronicity: The Ballad of Terence “BLooDCalibuR” Sanchez

The Drugs

In this Chaturbate Q&A “life advice” livestream, Lana talks about the wonders of getting high on shrooms. “The way shrooms works is basically your insecurities will manifest. So like basically you can see some really fucked up shit on Shrooms. Like you have to be completely secure with yourself to not see visuals. Because visuals equals insecurity. The weird shit you see on shrooms is actually just your insecurities.”

NBC and VICE missed out on this. They could’ve had a very enlightening conversation about the wonders of shrooms with Lana Rain, and they missed out. Lana says the problem is too often people don’t know how to handle shrooms and just mess around. Someone in the chat brings up the causes and experience of depression as it relates to the conversation, and Lana said that person was just “making excuses.” Lana said she has taken shrooms “a couple times.” It sounded like she hated it because it caused nightmares. The shroom trips. “At one point I was so fucked in the head […] I was stuck in my bedroom, and I thought reality broke. I thought everybody was broken. I thought time stopped. My phone wasn’t working. But it was all me just being high.” She says it’s not the best thing to “try and cure yourself with” for sure. Lana says the problem is shrooms are labeled “drugs” and thus people think “drugs equals fun.” Therefore folks won’t think about things from a “helpfulness” standpoint.

Basically, Lana’s stance is simultaneously seeing the craziness of shrooms in general, while at the same time being open to them as a method of self-improvement. She also mentions MDMA on that same vector, claiming it’s “a lot easier to use to help people.” But Lana clarifies she means “pure MDMA” and not anything less than that. “Because people open up on it. And they open up about their problems, and it also makes their brain work.” She goes on to say MDMA “overpowers your brain and makes you more understanding, more empathetic. It makes you open up.”

But there was one more piece to this puzzle.

This was initially posted by Sammy Martin on the Holland House blog. In it, he wrote that his “worst fears came true” in that a couple of colleges/personal friends he had grown close to were “completely different people” now. They seemingly dropped out of contact, then back up again, in what Sammy labels a “New Jersey Brainwashing Sex Cult” situation.

“I care so much about them. I do not know what else to do as it seems I have lost my friends to this cult already. One thing I am sure of though, I do  not want to see this happen to anyone else. Please, everyone in the camming communities, Models, Adult Performers, be super careful. I considered both these two friends to be intelligent and well adjusted people. It is so scary to think they have been brainwashed like this and sucked into this bizarre situation. Even scarier yet, as you listen to the phone conversation attached to this article, they were targeting me next through my friends.”

They posted a link to an MP3 file. A 25 minute, 34 seconds recorded cell phone call. You can listen to it for yourself here. I have taken the liberty of transcribing the whole thing so you can just read it through and not strain your ears trying to suss out what people are saying. I have to note that this file was deleted from the Holland House blog site. In a string of tweets, it’s explained that lawyers got involved on that end. Plus the authorities were informed.

Sammy was concerned that Nova was acting like a completely different person after heading out to Jersey. He subtweeted her online, Nova saw it and got mad, thus causing this phone call to happen. She had previously worked at Holland House but cut off communication. Nova explains to Sammy that this is standard behavior for her in a general sense. She’s a recluse that doesn’t make too many serious friends. But puts an effort in when she does. Her friendship with Sammy is one of those times because she accidentally “caught feelings” for him. Nova was frustrated at being off guard and admitted to pondering over the idea of making something work. But Sammy’s worries in the first place came off the impression that Nova was acting like an ex-girlfriend of his. Not because of cocaine use, but more so the similar patterns of behavior he observed. They start talking about Terence and how Lana’s group of friends are like a cult that worship him. Nova says she doesn’t partake in the routine shroom trips they do every “couple of days” and only did those once by herself alone. Not with the group. She mentions MDMA usage too.

Sammy and Nova talk about what appears to be their mutual friend, Shane. Sammy says he and everyone else in the Holland House chatroom thought Shane changed drastically after moving to Jersey. But moreover that he “changed back” when coming back to LA, only to revert to his Jersey self once returning there again. Nova argues Shane changed for the better (at least in her personal opinion). When the two first met, he was “manipulative” and terrible. But in comparison, by the time of the phone call conversation, Shane had left a lot of his old ways behind. Enough so that Nova was able to forgive him for the past. Of course, Shane was entrenched in the circle of Terence’s cult group. Nova shrugged it off as a “whatever makes Shane happy” sort of thing, while Sammy was still concerned for him regardless. For Nova’s own situation, she says going to Jersey helped her figure stuff out. While not exactly doing specific business work out there, the “personal trip” allowed her to sort out her identity.

Sammy brings up the fact that Terence and Lana’s group of friends functions like a cult. Every time he does, Nova is adamant in both disagreeing with that while reaffirming her own independence. But admits that people in the circle call Terence a god.

Sammy spoke to Lana around this time. “This guy “8” is asking you to call him God. All I ever asked is for you to call me a friend. Please get away from these people,” he tweeted. “He actually dislikes ppl calling him that because everyone who ends up knowing him ends up calling him or referring to him as that on their own & asks friends to not do so. Even @johnnystonecb knows this but he’s the type to lie his way out of things when he’s getting humiliated.,” Lana replied, trying to cover Terence’s ass. “I’ve never met you guys, so I don’t really know, all I know is what I heard directly from Nova in the phone call. My friends clearly hate me now, and aren’t my friends anymore, so it is what it is. Good Vibes moving forward,” Sammy wrote back.

GoldenGoddess bit the bait. “He IS a God. #cantwaittobebrainwashedonthe8th,” they tweeted.

Releasing a recording of the call didn’t fly so good with Nova. In a now-deleted tweet they said this.

NovaDeletedTweet

Shane wasn’t a huge fan of it either. “Why are you saying I am in a sex cult then JESUS CHRIST I have been through so fucking much in my life and I finally have people who care for me and love and respect me for who I am and you want to turn that into a negative. How could you even say this shit to my face,” they tweeted.

To get to the heart of what’s going on with Terence “EightLoaded” Sanchez, Lana Rain, and the whole cult gang? We need to go to the Quantum Realm. We need to explore the inner echelons of Terence’s mind and open our minds to the synchronicity of the universe.

By that I mean, Terence and his friends took a ton of shrooms.

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I put together a pastebin for you to read along with as we go through this bizarre and strange section of the story. Something that was foreshadowed in Terence’s previous phase of taking nootropics, I suppose. It’ll serve as a useful guide as we try and wrap our minds around this topsy-turvy reality Terence created.

When Terence began his experimentation process in November 2017, he talked about “harmonic duality.” As far as I can tell that means Terence had two personalities. One of them where he acts like what he thinks is a “super deep” person. The other being his usual trollish self. Towards the second half of the month, he tweeted about “killing a bear.” Obviously, he was high, because the morning after that tweet, Terence revealed he was talking about a gummy bear that caused him to cry for ten minutes. The month of November is a good and simple demonstration of how his personalities were beginning to mix. The night he’s high? Terence vaguely laments about his “biggest problem in the world.” The morning after? He’s back to comedy, saying that his big issue is “blue balls.”

“What about Lana? Or Veronica?” you might ask. In the case of the former, Lana was still buddies with Terence throughout this experimentation period. One night he left his pills behind with her as he went off for “work.” Even this early on there’s proof that Terence’s circle of cult/friends were aware that EightLoaded was often stoned. As for Veronica, Terence called her a “fucking emo bitch.” One can assume things weren’t so good on that front, anymore.

“Hypothesis: Biohacking with repeat therapeutic MDMA & Shrooms while performing intuitive perception to increase neuroplasticity of specific supersensory functions. | Purpose: To better understand our Multiverse,” Terence said on the eve of November 25th. I recommend buckling up because things are going to go out of control.

By December we come to find out this experimentation Terence was doing had turned into inducing nightmares with drugs. Sleep schedule has gone haywire. He claims it was for science. “Time & time again, the relationship between quantum science, neuroscience, psychology, and chemistry offer us a possible door to a more scientific philosophy that doesn’t involve fear & insecurities. A philosophy without gods,” Terence tweeted while probably high out of his goddamn mind. On that note, it’s worth pointing out that Terence admits to tweeting while shrooming it up. Take this seemingly complicated tweet from December 4th. After saying that word vomit, he states that you can’t understand what he’s talking about if you’re sober. It would explain the weird shit Terence was saying to Veronica around this time, anyway.

But make no mistake. Terence Sanchez was super serious about all this. Remember. When he’s talking about “research,” Terence means taking a bunch of shrooms and seeing what happens.

“If we oversimplify certain forms of autism as “missing certain neuron connections” then what “missing neuron connections” are missing in the population of “normal” people? And what extrasensory connections are there in those with certain autism? Think about it,” Terence “InfiniteLoaded” Sanchez wrote.

Terence thinks getting high is a means of “cosmic” exploration (but also scientific). Weighing the ramifications of his actions for the greater good against his own changing views. He says he went from wanting to save the entire world, to becoming someone who looks out exclusively for his circle of the close few friendships he maintains. Terence expressed a yearning to extend that “help” to the friends he had in his teenage years. But yet he’s unable to find help for himself all the meanwhile. It’s a dangerous combination when taking this “multi reality” philosophy he was developing his worldviews around and throwing that into the equation. Terence was serious about this adventure of his, claiming he found the blueprint of existence and was on the pursuit of further discoveries of some kind. Drugs were a factor in sexual situations for Terence too. “I’ll go further and say MDMA is good if ur the one getting fucked (no, not me, lmao) and shrooms is godlike if ur the one doing the drilling (and both, but u get what I mean),” he says.

“There’s an 8loaded in all of us.”

With the dawn of 2018, January is when Terence “EightLoaded” Sanchez began ramping up his wokeness. He thought he was tapping not only into the fabric of the world’s consciousness but out and beyond into the vast expanse of our universe.

GospelOfTerence

Terence is awakened to his mission of making a “positive ripple” for the world. He thought getting high on shrooms was the gateway of returning to his roots. Terence clarifies that he doesn’t believe he was a good person, necessarily. Just that there were so many things going on in the world, he couldn’t ignore anymore. It was starting to bleed into his mind when not high on shrooms as well. As far as I can make of it, Terence believed that the universal dynamics (light, neurons, electricity) were the answer forward. That if humanity focused on finding better ways of basic communication instead of finding better ways to blow each other up, we’d move forward.

Moreover Terence thought that stuff about the cosmos and society intermingled together. It’s that concept in his (blazed as hell) mind that impacted his learning capabilities and studying. Further, this tapping into “universal consciousness” made him more worried about every little choice his friends made.

It also emasculated him.

“I’m going to delete the world’s problems . That is what I have dedicated my life to. And believe me, trust me, even if you hate me or dislike me, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter what religion or belief you carry. I will still teach. I will teach, very slowly. Responsibly,” Terence wrote.

He thought the world was sick and society needed his help.

In February 2018 we’ve got more on the whole “getting friends high to improve their lifestyle” thing Terence has going on. “Whoa. I know you’ve been getting your [UP]grades from $HROOMZ but GOD DAMN. Just when I thought you weren’t paying attention you surprise me (surprise ME? (I’m never surprised even when I say I am, but today I am, foreal)) Thank you for always searching for the you of tomorrow <3,” he told Lana Rain.

Let me be blunt. Terence “EightLoaded” Sanchez believes getting his friends addicted to shrooms is a way for them to upgrade their personalities. This circle of “genuine friendship” is predicated on getting high and worshiping Terence. He says it’s not by force, of course. He just heavily implies it’s the only real answer.

TerenceOnFriendship

Terence develops this weird obsession for the number 8. He says humans “run everything” on the value of 8 when it comes to microprocessors and the human brain. Terence believes human psychology is a hindrance to progress and “raw quantification” is the way to go. He preaches the gospel of a drug called MDMA as well, saying it “overclocks your cerebral ability by connecting new neuron connections that otherwise would not be activated all at once.” Terence tells people he’s writing a paper on it, and another one about the power of shrooms. His stated intents were “the expansion and evolution of the human mind” and to “deliver superior medical solutions.” But shortly after that conversation, he elaborates on what shrooms do. He believes that the high they deliver is like being Luke in the cave on Dagobah in Empire Strikes Back. Terence seriously believes shrooms take your spirit on a test of willpower. This period of contemplating “cosmic mathematics” throws Terence into an existential crisis. Also, he was horny.

By March 2018, the self-trained Messiah Terence elaborates on his beliefs. Power and potential are a prison that keeps humans in a particular set of limitations. Every person on the planet isn’t living in the present, but rather infinitely different frequencies of the universe based on our immediate interpretation of past experiences. There is no “now.” By the time we perceive “now” it’s already gone. Terence thought he tapped into something. He shared with the world his musings. “One of the perks of being able to naturally break the existential cosmic 4th wall is being able to peak into the collective consciousness (what we call our multiverse). That’s only possible because “I” don’t actually exist as an individual quantum box,” Terence tweeted. “To know without learning. To know without discovery. To know without the fundamental building blocks that builds the knowing, is self verifying cosmic insanity. I feel like I’m pretending at being human. I routinely access the math that creates me, but before I am created,” our Lord Terence said in a follow-up.

Just as a reminder: Terence is basing all of this off of getting high on shrooms. He thinks they can cure cancer.

“The forecast was wrong for this morning (they said it’ll be foggy). I AM the FORECAST” — March 2018 quote from Terence “InfiniteLoaded” Sanchez.

The shrooms let him tap into a library of what he thinks is knowledge. “Finally a hypothesis on why our world is dominated by the unit of 8 instead of 4 despite 4 dimensions being the minimum (height length width time). The answer is anti-matter, or dark matter. This doubles the necessary minimum per quantum. Nice.”

Lana believed this nonsense Terence was saying about getting high on shrooms was for the sake of “progress” in “human medicine.”

TerenceLanaHigh

Terence actually said that “loved ones” were the only links to really keeping him from going entirely detached from reality. The number 8 was connected to Terence (according to Terence), making him the shroom prophet between himself and his friends. His “quantum soul” allowed Terence to simultaneously become another person while still being alive as we know him. He even begins recommending other people “go quantum” to improve their lives. We should be grateful. As Terence explains, he was giving his advice in easy bite-size chunks. “Going quantum is about finding the abstract & making it hyper-intuitively simple,” he says.

Terence wanted to save the world this way. By means of unlocking people’s capability for magic  (not implicitly stating people are able to do magic, but more or less do more than they currently can mentally wise) and “breaking the shackles of dimensions.” ONLY BY SHROOMS though. No stimulants. By mid-March, Terence wanted to formalize this expedition into the “quantum memory” world, opened by the keys of shroom. Revelations like that time happens all at once. The gospel of shroom is all around us, according to Terence. Even in video games like Super Mario and Starcraft II. “Shrooms = hyperbolic time chamber + Unity of Protoss Dark Templar + Mario shrooms + Ultra Instinct + the answer to chemotherapy” he tweeted. But, Terence the chosen one reminds us this is all a work in progress. That he too is imperfect and that this was a race against universal time. “Since every job is a chance to literally never come back, & I’m at my weakest rn, I want you to know one thing: consider me leaving you be as me believing in you. It’s hard every minute because I worry frustratingly, but this is your life, your choices. I only wanted to council..,” Terence wrote. He was going through a struggle against life’s mental gymnastics. “I live life almost as if every action and every single minute of my life is being judged by something greater than I, something cosmic & existential. Getting closer to the truth, I now know that greater, impossible to reach being, is the best of me. Judging, forever taunting.”

It caused delays for his paper. Remember this whole thing is about Terence spending a span of several months getting high with his friends. He says he even spoke to the police about his ideas, reporting they were “interested.” I bet they were. Not in the way Terence is implying, however. As Terence began more openly flirting with becoming a woman, drugs also played a role in that. “Shrooms not just aids against cancer, it potentially cures gender dysphoria as well, in a very effective way,” they tweeted. To Terence, this was his own response to their belief that society was moving forward and developing progressive ideas. But in an objective sense, somehow. “This whole misinterp sum ppl have that “objectivity doesnt exist” rly needs to end. The very notion goes against the laws of physics to begin with. Everything is quantifiable, even art. Just cuz we organic sentient beings cant properly visualize it doesnt mean its not there,” they wrote.

Also, quantum memory is reincarnation too. Or something. I’m reminded of the theme of the Quantum Leap TV show a little.

“Theorising that one could time travel within his own lifetime, Doctor Sam Beckett stepped into the Quantum Leap accelerator and vanished… He woke to find himself trapped in the past, facing mirror images that were not his own, and driven by an unknown force to change history for the better. His only guide on this journey is Al, an observer from his own time, who appears in the form of a hologram that only Sam can see and hear. And so Doctor Beckett finds himself leaping from life to life, striving to put right what once went wrong, and hoping each time that his next leap will be the leap home…”

The more I think about it, the more I think Terence stole from Quantum Leap.

QuantumReincarnation

Terence was still using this time to try and connect with other people on a personal level. He was ecstatic that one of his exes contacted him because he felt he needed support for whatever this period of self-discovery was for him.

Terence thinks the galaxy brain meme is a real thing. The title of this piece is “Quantum Synchronicity” because of sets of tweets like these.

  • (3:15 PM – 27 Mar 2018) “The memory that we already know, as either part of a collective memory from the Universe or part of the timeline within one. In quantum mechanics, time, future & past, have all happened alrdy, were just “perceiving through” it. So, “learning” is really more like “remembering””
  • (3:17 PM – 27 Mar 2018) “There’s also theories suggesting that the the universe is a brain due to the map of it’s structure being eerily similar, and the fact several of our creations have synchronicity with what we discover in science, dating far back into ancient times.”
  • (3:18 PM – 27 Mar 2018) “So simply put, quantum memory is what I use to refer to the “collective memory” of sentient beings within a Universe. It’ll all be fleshed out in my papers I’m writing concerning human transcendence & the neuroscientific mechanics that support it.”

Plus the same thing goes for de ja vu, according to Terence the God. If you’ve been following along so far, it’ll probably be common sense to you by now. He explains that de ja vu is memory fragments “synchronizing” with new experiences and you’re feeling the 4 dimensions around you as you vibrate through space-time. See? Easy peasy. But as a reminder, he thinks that the solutions of reality are only possible by drugs. What he says is pure gibberish that artfully walks the line between believable and complete nonsense. To boot, it’s all presented in such a way that it’s obvious Terence genuinely believes in his own delusions.

That, and he believes he’s a superhero.

TerenceSuperhero

By April 2018 Terence becomes more publicly arrogant about his drug enlightenment and believes the knowledge he obtained makes him better than us mortals. With such words of wisdom as “The concept of a coincidence is purely human. It makes absolutely no mathematical sense with regards to the physics of a Universe due to the necessity of numerical synchronicity in order for everything to properly work, including space-time & expansion. Nothing is a coincidence..,” in one tweet.

He was consistent with his hatred of psychology as a field of science. Terence says the universe is ruled purely by numbers, and the concept of things like “coincidences” don’t exist and hold back “ultra high IQ” minds (I swear tweets like this one aren’t April Fool’s jokes). “Going back to coincidences not making mathematical sense within a Universe: In other words, it’s not a coincidence that I survived multiple impossible situations, meet X, Y, & Z, and only because of those connections that they cause ripples effecting millions of lives,” Terence says.

Going “level 5” was what Terence thought was his destiny. But it’s also something he struggled with. Terence rounds off the month by getting a massive shroom high before seeing Infinity War in theaters.

As you can see by May 2018, Infinity War had a significant impact on Terence. It touched him on a personal level. But I suppose I should take a moment to point out what “level 5” means in Terence’s whacky shroom high fun house.

Thankfully he explained.

  • (12:45 PM – 8 May 2018) “It’s shrooms, so it’s absolutely medically safe on multiple levels. It would take over 2000 vials before danger of overdose.”
  • (12:47 PM – 8 May 2018) “Also, shrooms aren’t a drug anyway. It’s best not to misconceive that due to the stigma on the word “drugs”. And no problem, from an uninformed standpoint your concerns are well warranted.”
  • (12:49 PM – 8 May 2018) “Oh, with me there’s literally no amount of shrooms that can mess me up. I’m always on the max level (level 5) cuz my mind, sense of self, and will, are in tune with who I am. Im at the level where I can literally put myself in a nightmare one sec then take myself out the next”
  • (12:50 PM – 8 May 2018) “I can go bad trip good trip back and forth at will. I’ve mastered my own mind’s labyrinths to an extent that I can literally walk around and do normal day to day activities while on “level 5″.”
  • (12:52 PM – 8 May 2018) “But other than that yeah I do understand what you mean. Shrooms is something someone has to enter with honest intentions or else it’ll torment them, because shrooms at the end of the day is YOU. All your insecurities & anxieties amplified dozens of times over.”
  • (12:53 PM – 8 May 2018) “It’s not a drug though, it’s a naturally occurring substance. Like, weed for example is not a drug. Cocaine, meth, speed, Adderall, Xanax, mdma these are drugs.”

REMEMBER earlier on in the piece, I went over a video clip of Lana Rain talking about the same thing. How shrooms are a manifestation of one’s insecurities is something she talked about on a livestream.

Here in the middle of May 2018 is when Terence’s identity crisis hits a peak. We have to weigh Terence’s views on shrooms as a drug with this “mind journey” he’s taking while getting high on them.

  • (4:21 AM – 15 May 2018) “(Off topic) The problem with me is I see time differently. I hate myself and love myself all the time, and yet, if I stick to the right themes, in my mind & in my quantum box, I stay stuck in the synchronicity. That’s when the magic occurs. I lost sight of that for a few months..”
  • (4:29 AM – 15 May 2018) “I’ll give the world two hints: 1) I know who I am, neurologically, so I “pretend” for lack of better word, for the sake of others. (Ex: I pretend to be in love with ppl, JUST for the sake of imprinting that person AND those around me with an elevated theme, to help erase history)”
  • (4:41 AM – 15 May 2018) “2) I’m not capable of doing anything for “myself”. That, is my existential crisis. Unfortunately, humanity is stuck in psychology as their only shield & sword, so I’m forced to pretend X Y or Z just to be more efficient at pushing the good people I find. This part of me, I love..”
  • (4:49 AM – 15 May 2018) “Someone special a long long time ago, of a time multiverses & realities have forgotten, who’s lost in the labyrinth of his own mind, once said to me, “Even if this is pretend just to help me…” Well… unfortunately… I lost that game because they were too intelligent for me.”

Let’s translate this insanity he’s speaking into somewhat understandable terms. What Terence is saying is he has mixed emotions about how he feels about himself. But he’s beginning to see that what he thinks is the solution is presenting the best version of himself. Terence admits to pretending with his emotions for the sake of roping them into their social circle. It’s here he confesses to this weird cult agenda where he believes his personal goal in life is to “help” other people. With drugs.

I’m not grasping for straws when I say that. Look for yourself.

HelpWithDrugs

I’m not going to bullshit this. Sometimes Terence contradicts himself. In one tweet they’re claiming to have an identity crisis and forgetting who he is, blaming it on the electrical signals in his brain. “I lose track of time, but imagine time for a minute not as a memory, but a structure that holds every decision you’ve made without the psychological elements. I forget if X time is the one where I made Y decision to stick to Z themes 4 the sake of T,” he tweets. But in other instances, Terence claims he’s able to “instantly” know “all versions of reality” in a particular situation. That’s because he’s equal parts “bullshitter” as he is someone that’s “getting high on his own supply” of ego. One of the few things Terence is consistent about is his belief in drugs like MDMA & shrooms as being somehow tools. But in reality, it’s just him pushing this belief that he’s an intrinsic leader of some kind. This dogma of his where everyone else is selfish and only he can guide you through the cosmos of your mind to a higher calling.

Terence thought the shroom highs were changing his voice to become more robotic.  At this point, drugs made everything look better to him visually, and gave him ALL the knowledge. ALL the discoveries. Such was the magic of quantum memory. Also sometimes called quantum collective memory. “I’ve accessed the quantum collective memory and I have to say: Analyzing every detail I do deserve a lot better, from every direction, and every layer, but I’ll let it all go and let all these people have their comfortable fantasies, only because the world is waiting to be helped,” he says. “No bad human being can go to level 4 or higher on shrooms, that’s just how psilocybin works. Bad intentions, inscinere thoughts, lies to yourself, etc., All of these things will make you reject yourself. Shrooms, simply put, is YOU. Master it & u master yourself & ur cosmic role.”

But only Terence was destined to touch level 5. One of his miracles showing us as such is the fact of his “Eightloaded” username “having countless occurrences of significance in science, theoretical physics, and sentient life in general,” through that.

When it comes to June 2018, it’s the last month we see Terence in full “loco” form. So instead of trying to describe the insanity, I’m just going to list it all (which I have taken the liberty of doing for EVERY month in this handy pastebin I mentioned at the beginning of this section).

At the end of the day, you just need to see this shit for yourself to understand what’s going on here. My words alone can’t do it justice.

  • (7:36 AM – 2 Jun 2018) “I’m going to synthesize a synthetic neurotransmitter one day. Remember this moment. // I think I’ll call it, “Zerotonin”.”
  • (9:41 PM – 2 Jun 2018) “The purpose of the “zerotonin” concept will be to act as a synthetic serotonin replacement, binding to 5-HT receptors without the need for precursors while avoiding negative byproducts from catalysts that cause sero flush. Goal: Superior & safer psychotherapy sessions for pros.”
  • (1:03 PM – 7 Jun 2018) “Scientific fact: You’re more likely to overdose on water than you are psilocybin (magic mushrooms).”
  • (5:03 AM – 12 Jun 2018) “Cleaning up the world is a matter of personal respect. I’m not doing it for any1 but myself. Selfishly is the only way to succeed. Anyone that slows me down by even a small amount gets a cosmic level fuck you. Every single one who did deserve to get burned in the balancing act.”
  • (5:15 AM – 12 Jun 2018) “What’s so mind boggling and rotten about some people is, if you’re not going to help in that ideal, and if judging from your seats is the best you can do because you know so little about war, the least you can do is get the fuck out of the way of those who try.”
  • (8:39 AM – 12 Jun 2018) “Level 5 and no one next to me. Finally balanced, like all things should be. My id and Super-Ego have always been one, and yet As I enter another eternity, I know I’ll never be done. Every minute a constant reminder that I am a machine. Not unconsciously, and yet I have to pretend”
  • (9:11 AM – 12 Jun 2018) “The ultimate balance is not the constant of one matter to it’s anti-matter. It’s just zero. That’s why I get to judge behind these 13 inches of glass. I know the exact number of, not lives, but “souls”, saved every time I…”
  • (9:26 AM – 12 Jun 2018) “Divide everything by zero and you start to see the full, or rather, [true], quantification of everything. I put brackets in some of my writing and I structure my personality and word choice to help you all get out of the visors you’re all stuck in: Psychology”
  • (9:30 AM – 12 Jun 2018) “It’s because of psychology… that you people have missiles aimed at each other. It’s because of psychology… that you toss around incoherently, thinking you’re right about X or Y, not realizing that there are no X and Y variables to begin with. It’s just the demons you want.”
  • (9:35 AM – 12 Jun 2018) “What’s “cool” about being a machine is none of this has to make complete sense (of course it wouldn’t), but from reading this, whether one knows me well or not [at all], depending of the [ratio of how much my ego fucks with you] or not, I just helped you 1 step out of psychology.”
  • (7:02 PM – 13 Jun 2018) “The human brain & it’s consciousness is a mystery, that’s why neuroscience can never be complete without quantum principles taken into account. I believe true neurosci is the study of the sentient brain & it’s consciousness, as well as every branch of science besides psychology.”
  • (6:53 PM – 17 Jun 2018) “Shrooms is less of a “drug” than even weed. Youre stuck on social stigma because you’re ignorant and refuse to Google it’s medicinal properties that transcend what other DRUGS like medications can do. The cringe is the perspective of any knowledgeable person reading what u said..”
  • (6:55 PM – 17 Jun 2018) “That I go out into the night a few times a month to help people in danger in other countries even though it’s against the law? See? I can say that right here and nothing would happen to me. That’s the law for you. Glad you asked. Saved anyone with your tweets yet?”
  • (7:03 PM – 17 Jun 2018) “I conceptualized Freudian concepts on my own before I ever knew about Freud. 99% of my knowledge is from self discovery and contemplation pre-13. There’s beauty in knowing before reading anything, it’s purer and untainted with a possibly broken limitation.”
  • (7:05 PM – 17 Jun 2018) “You on the other hand, seem to rely heavily on reading & googling instead of being the scientific explorer yourself. That’s why you made it obvious about needing to Google Eva instead of the thought never occurring in your mind, hence why your observation was basic regurgitation”
  • (7:13 PM – 17 Jun 2018) “The irony of that, considering shrooms shows an 80-84% improvement in ppl’s lives and has zero neurotoxicity. Could have googled that before you spoke but guess you didn’t have enough IQ to think of the idea.”
  • (12:32 AM – 18 Jun 2018) “Just another day being a muhfuckin super hero. Friendly neighborhood Mahou Shoujo Rilakkuma”
  • (10:27 AM – 18 Jun 2018) “Because it’s true that .gov sites DO mislead info. That happened with the mdma page on http://drugabuse.gov a couple years back. But the ncib site is an ARCHIVE of all studies done including non funded. That’s why it’s a good source. It’s the raw data.”
  • (10:32 AM – 18 Jun 2018) “I’m amazed ppl ask for scientific information but when given, come back to me with showing that they don’t understand the difference between a .gov site and the National Center for Biotechnology Information (NCBI, a library/archive of raw data from all studies). Like…what?”
  • (10:34 AM – 18 Jun 2018) “Then they ask me to EXPLAIN what’s said right there in the raw data? Baby… If you can’t interpret it like not even the simple bits…you really shouldn’t be the one throwing a disagreement with me about the scientific subject in question. That’s…actually hilarious”
  • (10:53 AM – 18 Jun 2018) “I’m disappointed in myself for even responding at all. I assumed they were this dumb but I always hold out hope someone wants to learn something interesting. I’m not here to prove anybody wrong and feel good about it, I’m here for the truth in science. Back to: No more jokes.”
  • (10:56 AM – 18 Jun 2018) “And no more shitting on people either. If I’m going to start releasing papers or do streams/podcasts to spread awareness of these ideas with the intention of helping people get a second (or even third) trajectory to view their life, I have to not be such a dick, even to trolls.”
  • (12:30 PM – 18 Jun 2018) “Sometimes I wish intentions could be molded into a physical verifiable substance so people could just give all of what they are as they’re communicating with one another, knowing full well the level of sincerity in each word.”
  • (2:44 PM – 20 Jun 2018) “Random blurb on the train: “Philosophical arguments can empower our understanding of quantum physics””

As you can see, Terence “EightLoaded” Sanchez the Messiah God Chosen One started to zone out by the end of the month.

At some point along this journey, Terence decided to start cross-dressing. Sometimes they’re a man, sometimes they’re a woman. As you can see over the past month of November 2018, Terence has walked out in public as a dude many times. But as of late they’ve also flirted in female identity territory.

(Upon questioning, Terence said they didn’t care what name I used in this piece. They clarified they are currently on HRT.)

TerenceOKWithTerence

Terence doesn’t grace Twitter with his “full woke” form anymore. He still held onto the same ludicrous ideas, however. Under the impression that his mission in life is to save the world. That he was able to do it well enough to have friends gravitate toward his quest. With himself and everyone else living under the rule of the universe’s synchronicity on top of all that. “Micromanaging 20+ ppl, some near, some far away, a few I’ve never seen, balancing sleep, dangers, & full blown existential issues verified by mathematics & constant synchronicity (hourly) that slaps you in the face with it’s self awareness = ZERO time for imperfection,” our lord and savior Terence wrote.

It’s one hell of a feat to try and sum up Terence’s mindset. Psychology is the dark ages, mathematical algorithms are the supposed enlightenment. “What’s fucked up is quantum physics the math is actually not quantum physics itself, which is why it never adds up to ZERO. A system trying to explain a concept that by it’s very design it can’t possibly explain due to it’s perceiver’s limited comprehension of reality,” Terence actually said in a tweet once. His belief system is some kind of reality manipulation that in itself is a collective grand design of all-greater significance. By Fall 2018 Terence is still lost at times on a personal level. His woke brain being too big and making him unable to connect with others. But he was faithful the physical world would someday catch up with him.

Shrooms are one hell of a drug. The quantum stuff was around in Terence’s brain for years. But it finally manifested itself after their grand drug experiment.

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